Last night at karaoke, Liz sat at our table.

For those of you not in the know, Liz is the girlfriend of the best karaoke host in the world, Bryan McDonald. We adore Liz. We think Bryan is a rock god. Having Liz sit at our table is like having Meat Loaf’s wife wave to us, okay? It’s just so damn cool. It’s like finally getting to sit at the cool table in high school with all the popular kids. Okay, it’s really not. It is a thousand times more awesome than a bunch of stuck up bitches and their dumb jock boyfriends finally letting you sit with them. But you get my point.

Anyway, Liz is introducing us to her friends. She says “This is Beth and Dana. They stalk Bryan. But I’m okay with it.”

There are several reasons why we are Bryan’s stalkers:

  1. When in Las Vegas, Beth and I contemplated going to a bar just so we could say that we sang karaoke in Las Vegas. Then we decided against it. Because it would be like cheating on Bryan. In a weird, he’s not our boyfriend sort of way. You know what I mean?
  2. I once had a dream that Bryan and Liz invited Beth and I to go to a basketball game. And I was really excited. Not because we like basketball but because we were going to be hanging out with Bryan and Liz outside of karaoke. And that would be like karaoke but even better! When I told Bryan this, he started backing away from me with the “you’re scaring me now” look on his face.
  3. I made many Christmas cards this year while over at Beth’s. I gave one of them away. To Bryan and Liz. And it was very odd. It was made of metalic shiny paper with multiple colors and metalic stars. And on the inside I wrote “Dude. You are my shining star. No, Dude. Seriously.” And then I finished up the sentiment with “This may be the ugliest card in the world so who better to give it to then the best karaoke host in the world and his awesome girlfriend.” Or something like that.
  4. I know where his mom works.
  5. We frequently refer to Bryan as our pusher. And karaoke as our drug of choice.
  6. When he sings, I’m pretty sure I start drooling. On occasion, I have required a cigarette while listening to him sing certain songs. It is akin to watching Bobby pour water. Seriously.

Okay, maybe I’m the one stalking him and Beth’s just along because I don’t drive. But anyway, isn’t it cool that Liz refers to us as Bryan’s stalkers?

She also asked us if we enjoyed karaoke and we said yes, we did. She told us to start dating a karaoke host and we wouldn’t enjoy it that much. Beth made the valid point that the only karaoke host we knew was Bryan so that wouldn’t work.

Liz replied “No. You can’t date him. I’ll let you stalk him but I won’t share him with you.”

Have I mentioned how much I love my life that stalking a minor celebrity like Bryan is condoned by his girlfriend? And that she also gave us a tentative invitation to come out and hang at their place when they have a bonfire!

We’re in!

Beth told me in the car later that she almost did a happy dance but decided that would be just a little too weird. But there was squealing in the car later. Happy, joyous, teenagers fascinated with a rock star squealing!

May your days be merry and bright and your Diet Coke always have lime.

Previous Comments:

At 2:15 PM, brooksba said…
DM,Yes, the thrill of being invited over to our “Karaoke Idol”‘s house. And having Liz sit with us. Yep, we rock. In a weird, stalker kind of way. Hey, I emailed the code to you as well. It’s in one of your gmail accounts.