Today I went to the doctor for a physical. Joy. I got to lie on a table, covered in pieces of pretend “cloth” (thick paper), while I was subjected to the two most wonderful things about being a woman…a breast examination and Pap Smear. Can you say yay? I knew you could.

I love my doctor because she is very nice and introduced me to my happy pills (Not to interrupt my train of thought or anything but iTunes Party Shuffle is playing Air Supply’s “Lost In Love” and my God, could it be any more annoying?). She rarely lectures and we have discussions about what I should do to make my life better. Today we discussed the possibility of my having a hysterectomy to correct something I affectionately refer to as “Bloody Hell.” I’m not sure of the actual name of the horror but I hate it. And I have to take Provera, which I hate even more. That’s all I’m saying about it. If you want to know more, there is always Google.

Do you know how nice it is to have a doctor who doesn’t automatically say “But that would be a crime against humanity if you don’t pop out a kid!”? It’s very nice. She understands I have no desire to have children, there is a medical problem that could be solved easily, it’s something to consider. We’re going to talk about it again on the next visit.

Also, no matter how long has gone between our visits (the last time I saw her previously to this year was back in 2003), she remembers everything about me without having to read the chart. Which led to this conversation:

Deb (my doctor, preparing for breast examination): Have you noticed any lumps?
DM (lying naked on examination table except for paper vest and paper drapes, breasts exposed to the world (okay, hiding off to either side of my body)): No.
Deb: Didn’t you have some nipple rings once?
DM: Ah, yes, but I had to remove them when I had to have the mammogram.
Deb: And your mother had breast cancer in her 30’s, right?
DM: Yes.
Deb: You need to go for another mammogram.
DM: DAMN YOU!

Okay, I rarely swear at her. She was amused to learn about the vast amount of Portuguese that Beth and I knew, including bacon and Sacana.

I had to take a cab to my appointment today since I had a choice between busses. I could take the one that left at 7:45 or the one that left at 2:15. Since I didn’t wake up until 10:30 and my appointment was at noon, I didn’t have much choice. In Portugal, the trip to the monastery was a longer distance than I traveled today and cost less, even with the conversion rate.

Eddy is still sneezing and I’m going to try calling vets tomorrow. We think it could be allergies, though, Jeff cleaned all of the carpets just recently. He does seem to be doing a little bit better. He came out of Keem’s bedroom for a bit and climbed up to knead her chest and stomach (Did I mention that he adores her (Eddy, not Jeff)). Then he sprawled across her and purred very loudly. I do not have a picture of this, wish I did. I do have some pictures that I took today, after I got back from the doctor’s and waited for Keem to come home and pick me up.

My day was not overly exciting. But it wasn’t bad. I miss Portugal. But I’m also glad to be home because it is SPRING! Finally!

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