I do not know why I’ve had so much difficulty coming up with a topic for E. I thought about Exes but that’s just way too depressing to think about my past love life. I was going to write about a past employer that truly ticked me off but I found myself getting incredibly long-winded. And then it hit me. It’s not like there isn’t a 5 pound* squirming orange annoying pest cat named Eddy that is constantly under foot.*

*He may be closer to 10 pounds now. He’s getting a pretty big belly.

E is for Eddy

Eddy entered my life many years ago. Anywhere between 1995-1998. Probably 1998 but I don’t really remember (yet another reason not to have kids. “Mom, when was I born? How old am I?” “How the hell should I know? Ask your Aunt Kari”). My roommate at the time brought him home to add to her growing cat collection. Here was this tiny bundle of orange fur that fit into the palm of my hand and who had a tail that was so long, you could wrap it around him 3 times. I fell in complete and total love.

My roommate was going to name him Peaches and I rebelled. First of all, I hate peaches. They are a disgusting fruit and completely gross me out. In fact, I refuse to even say things are “just peachy” and will instead say “just orangy.” Because I am weird. And also, he obviously wasn’t a Peaches. He was an Edmund Orange.

Edmund Gray was the name of one of the characters on All My Children, a soap that my roommate watched and one that I had started watching with her (I am flexible that way. I don’t particularly have a soap that I watch but will watch whatever my roommates are addicted to. Right now it’s Guiding Light and As the World Turns). He was my favorite so I named Eddy after him.

Also, in high school, my nickname was Edmund Wayde the 2nd.* Or Eddy. So it was only natural that I name my cat after Edmund Gray and myself. Or natural in my world.

*Edmund Wayde the 1st was one of the 4 parrots in my stuffed animal collection. Edmund after my favorite song at the time “The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald” and Wayde after the really hot guy who worked at Donatelle’s where my friends and I would hang out on the weekends.

Eddy was curious and intrigued by anything. His favorite things to do were to “help” Anya or myself with things. One of these times was when Anya was putting up Christmas lights. Eddy was absolutely fascinated with this. He would watch her put the light cord into the suction cup holder and stick it to the window. And then he would bat at it until it fell down. He could repeat this for hours. Even when she put him in another room so she could hang them, it was normal to find the lights hanging askew the next morning. It was hilarious. Anya wasn’t as amused as I was but hey, to each their own.

As you can see, he still has a fascination with lights. This was taken about 3 years ago.

Let there be light strings

This was my Christmas card. Apparently I’m not the only one with Bright Shiny Object syndrome.

Ooh, pretty

Another time, I had fallen asleep on the couch. It was summer and my bedroom was incredibly hot since the air conditioning didn’t reach much past the kitchen, let alone down the hallway. I woke up at about 3 AM by this strange ringing, jingling noise. What was it? Where was it coming from?

It was my cat. Anya had turned off the air and opened the patio door to allow fresh air to come in through the screen door. Since Eddy still had his claws, he had managed to open the door. Excited with his newfound freedom, he decided to run back and forth on the patio. Jingle, jingle. Jingle, jingle, jingle. Jingle. Smart enough to open the door, not smart enough to actually take off.

At the same time I discovered Eddy was outside, Nala had run into Anya’s room and started meowing loudly to wake her up.* Anya came wandering into the living room and we then realized that not only had Eddy made a run for the border, so had Prowler and Swayze (yes, named after Patrick, because the cat was fairly graceful and the ladies loved him), a cat we were watching for a friend.

*We decided she was telling on the boys. It sounded exactly like a little girl running to her mother to tattle tale.

Thus began the Cat Wrangling event. I finally coaxed Eddy inside and Anya and I started looking through the parking lot, hoping to find the errant boys. I found Swayze, crouched underneath a neighbor’s car. He wouldn’t come to me so I had to lie on the ground and squirm under the car until I was able to grab him. I was just waiting for someone to ask me just what the hell I was doing with their car but managed to not completely embarrass myself. I did, however, have a ton of gravel embedded in my knees. Not fun.

I decided to continue the search for Prowler a block over at our old apartment building because he had loved to go outside and stare at the ducks that lived in the pool (the pool had been closed for years but had filled up with rain water). While looking for him, our old neighbor nearly gave me a heart attack by standing in the shadows. Since there were no lights in the parking lot, I didn’t see him until he smiled and his gleaming teeth said hello. Freaked the heck out of me. Prowler was not to be found, not that an almost completely black cat would be easy to spot. Finally, at about 4:00, I headed for home, only to find out Prowler had returned about 15 minutes after I had brought Swayze back.

Eddy will no longer wear a collar and he really hates it when I try to put hats on him (but it’s fun and I’m really mean so I’ll keep trying) but he still loves to try and escape. There has been many times that I am chasing him down the hallway, hissing for him to stop running. He has walked into someone else’s apartment before. That was fun, having to knock on their door and say “Hey, uh, my cat is in your apartment” wanting to say “Um, dude, why is your door open? Do you not understand the whole cats and curiosity thing?”

Here are some more recent pictures of Eddy and also the Demon Cat, Sebastian. I will be getting the Demon Cat again in May while Kari and Eric go to Las Vegas for Rob (Eric’s Dad) and Betty’s (Rob’s long time girlfriend) wedding. I apparently will also be watching gerbils or hamsters…some sort of rodent. That should be fun.

This picture is when Eddy and Sebastian started playing together but before Sebastian decided to try and make Eddy his bitch.

Eddy and Sebastian

Eddy in a box. This is normal. The other day, Keem and I heard this strange thumping noise and discovered the cat with his head inside of the box her cell phone came in. The box barely came to his shoulders but he was trying like crazy to get all of himself inside of it. He’s just slightly insane.

Box Kitty

Okay, when I said recent pictures, I meant around Christmas. It takes me a little time to load pictures. As you can see, Eddy’s already trying to get rid of the hat.

Apparently Eddy doesn't understand what "Kitty!  Look here!" means

Here Eddy poses by the Christmas tree. The pink beaded ornament was created by yours truly. Enjoy my mad beading skills. It’s amazing at how creative I am (wow! I can make a semi-spiral! Woo-hoo!).

Eddy and tree

Eddy is trying to attack the garland I am making for the tree. Shocking, isn’t it, that a cat would try to attack a string?

Okay, now he's making his move

Eddy makes love to the camera. Well, actually it’s the tripod but still…

Eddy makes love to the camera

Okay, that’s it for now. Any suggestions for F? This encyclopedia thing is harder than I thought. I have no clue how Sass did it!

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