My name is Dana Marie Vittum. If you meet a Vittum, I am related to them somehow. I am 45 and live in Inver Grove Heightsl, Minnesota.

I am single and have been for over a decade. I am okay with this and have learned to live with it. I know I do not need a man to make me happy or complete. This was a big change for me because, in my past life, I thought that was the holy grail.  Although I miss kissing.  A lot.

Someone suggested I set up a wish list at I did. Here is the link. Do not feel obliged to buy me anything. I don’t require material things as proof of your devotion. Your continued love, occasional comment and your first born child will do. Wait. Forget that about the kid. Not really into kids. Buy me something (I kid. I jest. I’m a funny girl). I am the (self proclaimed) Queen of the Universe. Join my cadre of loyal subjects and all will be well in your world. My mantra is “Embrace Chaos. Adore Chaos. Give Chaos a big kiss on the mouth.” or “No one ever suspects the socks.”

You can contact me by emailing me at greenduckiesgirl AT comcast DOT net. I reserve the right to publish anything you send me, especially if you are telling me how wonderful I am. If you send me hate mail, I will say a prayer for your deluded soul and mock you on my website. I also reserve the right to hunt you down and find a suitable punishment if you spam me.

Here are some posts I have written that might explain my craziness a little bit better.